Thursday, June 10, 2010

Ive talked a lot about how excited I was to grow up and take on new things.

But now, as I am growing up I fear that I have done it too fast. I thought that finishing high school early would be a great head start to starting a career that Ive been interested in for so long. However, its a lot more responsibility than I thought. The biggest responsibility is actually getting myself to school. I have found that extremely hard lately. I have succeeded to not miss any school but every day I argue with myself about going. In the beginning I was excited about getting up and going to school every day. Part of that is because I think it was something new for me. While I do love it there, I have also found it to be extremely repetitive in so many different ways. And I think 'isn't every job some what repetitive?' Do I just get too bored with things too easily?

I am actually graduating high school tomorrow. With that reality, came a lot of thinking. And Ive been thinking extremely hard about failure. Its my biggest fear no doubt and strangely, I'm not afraid to say that. Its the 'what if I don't' kind of thing. Like what if I cant make enough money? What if I cant ever buy my own home? What if I'm not good at what I do? The list goes on and on and on. Now I'm starting to realize that its holding me back.

5 comments:

Kim said...

Heather, why is it harder to get to school? If a limo came and picked you up every morning, with breakfast/coffee available in the limo, and your favorite music was playing, and your best friend was sitting beside you for no reason except to keep you company on your ride to school, and it would cost you absolutely nothing, and that same limo picked you up at the end of school, would you still be hesitant? Would you still want to get through the next 6 months of classes to get your diploma? Do you want to be cutting hair, part time or full time, in let's say....7 months? In seven months you could be doing what you love. Seven months. Just one more month than you've been in school at this point in time.

One thing at a time, Heather. Will you ever own a home? Yes. Will you ever make enough money? Yes. The world is yours, don't let anyone tell you different.

KnowledgeEater said...

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